but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize