so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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