Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
We smell like vodka and hangover
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