Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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