I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Sorry my hands just texted you
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
