Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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