i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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