so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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