The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
