She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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