Christians are straight up FREAKS
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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