wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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