You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
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I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
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Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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