You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?