Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
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