Can Purell be used as lube?
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
