hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
