She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
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