I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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