Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
