I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
