I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
