your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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