We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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