Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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