Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
