I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
