hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
so much tequila, so little girl.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
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