but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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