i think my tv is drunk
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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