ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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