i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
