I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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