You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome