Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704): see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it http://tfl.nu/o2df
  Replies (33) Good night (9310) Bad night (1239)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting http://tfl.nu/gfmw
  Replies (13) Good night (4430) Bad night (740)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I forgot about that,good spring break.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild" (773): I forgot about that,good spring break. http://tfl.nu/09xy
  Replies (16) Good night (6181) Bad night (1278)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom. http://tfl.nu/hw22
  Replies (13) Good night (5646) Bad night (1091)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with. http://tfl.nu/07fq
  Replies (158) Good night (2556) Bad night (12520)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in http://tfl.nu/9hap
  Replies (8) Good night (3761) Bad night (904)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  other than the jail part I had a really good time with you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): other than the jail part I had a really good time with you http://tfl.nu/dcut
  Replies (3) Good night (1727) Bad night (519)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up http://tfl.nu/86tf
  Replies (2) Good night (652) Bad night (917)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers http://tfl.nu/b3az
  Replies (10) Good night (1586) Bad night (437)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show http://tfl.nu/2ff1
  Replies (4) Good night (833) Bad night (520)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex. http://tfl.nu/7adn
  Replies (2) Good night (1786) Bad night (771)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno http://tfl.nu/05ob
  Replies (8) Good night (817) Bad night (441)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals http://tfl.nu/zqc1
  Replies (1) Good night (427) Bad night (256)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (623): It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day. http://tfl.nu/ue2e
  Replies (1) Good night (270) Bad night (477)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life? http://tfl.nu/hyy5
  Replies (14) Good night (323) Bad night (555)

Randomize