Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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