I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
