I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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