sorry about calling you the devil all night.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
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