you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
