Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
