Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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