In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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