Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
