The maid of honor just puked.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
