I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
