the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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