I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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