Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize