yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Randomize