whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
